I’ve tried not to dwell in print on my health problems, and especially not on pain.  However, for a week pain has been the defining factor in my life.  It all started one morning when I noticed some bright, red stuff in the john.  I figured it was a one-time thing and didn’t worry about it.  Then it happened again, and again.  I was trying really, really hard to convince myself that I could ignore it and it would go away.  That didn’t happen!  My friend the RN yelled at me and made me call Dr. Colon.  Of course, as I had feared, he thought all thatred toilet water was not a good thing and insisted on a colonoscopy.

Now, I don’t really object to a colonoscopy in and of itself.  However, there’s that 24-hour prep beforehand that really turns me off.  First you have to eat nothing but clear liquids.  After a few hours of that my colon is pretty clean, but that is not enough.  Then you have to drink a gallon of some stuff that tastes like salt and baking soda mixed together.  Being a diabetic, I also have to keep careful track of my blood sugars.  This is all old hat for me, having done it several times before.  It’s not a process I’ve ever enjoyed, but I’m pretty tough so I knew I could do this.  Then I had a reaction I’ve never had before.  I gagged and wanted to throw up.  Then I did throw up.  Only managed to drink about half of what was ordered, so I was worried about the procedure not going smoothly.  No problem there, however.  Doc took a look, banded a couple internal hemorrhoids, and warned me this is known to cause some pain.  That’s ok, I’d already filled my prescription for pain pills.

I thought I’d have a couple days of pain, maybe a day or two of mild discomfort, and then I could go on with my life as though nothing had ever happened.  I totally underestimated the amount and the duration of the aforementioned pain.  Procedure was Tuesday, today is Sunday, and I’m still taking pain pills.

I don’t know what sort of  ‘switch’ was tripped when Dr. Colon was taking his little look-see, but I have gone from fighting high blood sugars (sometimes extremely high for nearly 6 months) to having frequent low blood sugars.  I’ve had to cut back on the amount of insulin I’m taking and still I get all shaky and sweaty and have to eat NOW.  (I always check my blood sugars first.)  Yesterday I had to treat for low blood sugars three times and then eat a bed-time snack so as not to go too low overnight.  I was so full!!!!!!!

I have frequently been comforted by my mother’s favorite passage of scripture:  “And it came to pass.”  I’m sure this, too, shall pass.  With any luck once it does I’ll be better than ever.  I have a Christmas I’d like to enjoy.  Colonoscopies and low blood sugar readings do not put me in the holiday spirit.

One bright spot:  Before I had to go through all the prep and aftermath, I had my nails done all sparkly and bright for the holidays.  It’s the only decorating I’ve done thus far, but it makes me smile every time I look at my hands.

Several sources have suggested that it might be good to concentrate on gratitude for the month of November.  Post one thing each day that you are grateful for.  Well, lately I’m grateful for morning sun.  Every morning when it’s clear the sun comes through my living room window and warms the room.  For 15-20 minutes around 9:30 it hits directly on my favorite chair and blinds me to all else.  I enjoy sitting there, basking in the warmth and the brightness.  I simply close my eyes and enjoy the Vitamin D.

Or, rather make that tonight.  I only had one kinda short (10-15 minutes tops) nap today, didn’t have anything with caffeine in it after noon, feel sleepy, but at nearly 3:00 AM I am still wide awake.  I have nights like this occasionally and I am learning to really HATE them.  I’ve read ’til I don’t want to read anymore.  That usually puts me out.  I’ve checked both Mingle and Facebook.  (I have been known to sit in front of the computer screen and sleep.  Nothing’s working tonight.  My tummy keeps growling at me and insisting it’s hungry, but my blood sugar was 249 at midnight so I don’t think I’m really hungry.  Maybe I just need someone to share my bed and hold me through the night.  I don’t generally miss Hubs in my bed.  It’s been 4 1/2 years since he went in the nursing home, and he had slept in his recliner for several years before then.  But tonight I could use the comfort of his presence.  I’m gonna go now before I get maudlin.

Welcome to the new AdamsWife’s Weblog.  I can’t promise to post any more often than I have in the past, but I’m gonna try.  I’m thinking about doing NaBloPoMo in November.  Anyone else going to take the 30 posts in 30 days challenge?

I’ve been trying to avoid blogging about days when I’m feeling less than well.  I’ve decided if I continue to do that I will never blog.  I’ve been a bit miserable all day.  You know – one of those days when you just want to whine a little.  I know whining doesn’t really make you feel better, but it does fulfill a need that somehow makes it easier to deal with all the petty, little stuff.  This morning I had a headache, my pacemaker was hurting, my tummy was not feeling really well, and my ankles were swelling.  Can’t just go back to bed and pull the covers over my head, because spending too many hours in bed just makes my back hurt.  So – whining seems the best alternative.  By now all the little annoyances have settled down into a pain in my pancreas.  I’ve given in and taken some Meperidine for that and should feel better soon – or I won’t care which is almost as good.

It’s been a long time since I spent time visiting other people’s blogs.  Not going to start that today, but soon.  I’ll be reading what you have to say and hoping for some feedback and love from you in return.  Now I’m gonna go hold my tummy and wait for that drug to take effect.  :D

Wow!  I haven’t done very well with keeping up my blog.  I discovered FaceBook and comment there frequently, but these are short comments, nothing like a blog.  I’m still fighting health problems, still need to lose weight, still have days when I feel lonely.

In March I left my daughter’s home and moved to Buhl, Idaho.  She and her family followed me a month ago.  We now live close, but not in the same house.  There were some ups and downs in accomplishing the move, but things are settled for right now, at least.  Not being a psychic I cannot write about the future.

I now live in my own, little (very little) apartment in a senior citizen complex.  I am enjoying being on my own for the most part.  It’s the first time I’ve ever actually lived alone.  Always before I had a roommate or a daughter or Hubs.  Now it’s just me and I find I like it that way.

I hope some of my former blog friends are still around and I can make contact with them again.  (I’ll be adding to my book list regularly.  I’m still reading a lot.)

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I’ve been doing some computer searches on cirrhosis and hepatitis.  Apparently what I heard as “cirrhosis” and “hepatitis” when the doc was dictating was actually “Steatosis” and “steatohepatitis.”  Information follows:

Points to Remember

• Nonalcoholic steatohepatitis (NASH) is fat in the liver, with inflammation and damage.
• NASH occurs in people who drink little or no alcohol and affects 2 to 5 percent of Americans, especially people who are middle-aged and overweight or obese.
• NASH can occur in children.
• People who have NASH may feel well and may not know that they have a liver disease.
• NASH can lead to cirrhosis, a condition in which the liver is permanently damaged and cannot work properly.
• Fatigue can occur at any stage of NASH.  (Yeah, I sometimes have problems with fatigue.)
• Weight loss and weakness may begin once the disease is advanced or cirrhosis is present.
• NASH may be suspected if blood tests show high levels of liver enzymes or if scans show fatty liver.
• NASH is diagnosed by examining a small piece of the liver taken through a needle, a procedure called biopsy.
• People who have NASH should reduce their weight, eat a balanced diet, engage in physical activity, and avoid alcohol and unnecessary medications. (The alcohol and unnecessary meds are no problem.  lol)
• No specific therapies for NASH exist. Experimental therapies being studied include antioxidants and antidiabetes medications.  (Already got that covered.)

I got the part about losing weight right, anyway.  Don’t know if I have NASH or if he was putting that into the record as a possibility.  Anyway, I have to get out and exercise and watch what I eat.  Anybody want to join me in this endeavor?

Well, I’ll be moving to Buhl the first of March.  Our home has to be sold to avoid foreclosure.  The former s-i-l gave up his job and stopped paying child support.  Without the child support daughter couldn’t make the mortgage payments.  So we’re out of here.  Luckily the low-income, senior citizen housing in Buhl has an opening about the middle of February and I can move in the first of March.  I’m gonna miss my daughter and my grandkids, but I won’t miss the weather.

I’m going to have to find some new doctors eventually.  Cardiologist, Endocrinologist, Ophthalmologist, ENT.  But I already go to Twin Falls to see the dentist and the Gastroenterologist.  I hate to leave my diabetic doc, but it might be time to bring a new perspective to the table, too.  I haven’t decided if I want to drive up here to see him every 3 or 4 months or find someone new.  Decisions, decisions.

Speaking of Dr. Diabetes, I saw him today and got the results of my liver biopsy.  I have a fatty liver.  (Matches the rest of me.  ;D)  He says the treatment is the same as for my diabetes:  lose weight.  He highly recommends a food diary to lose weight.  So – I guess I’m gonna start writing down everything I eat (just as soon as I get back from Florida).

I leave for Orlando on Tuesday.  We will spend two days at Disney World and then go on to the condo at New Smyrna Beach.  We’re going to lay in the sun and eat seafood and relax and have fun.  This will be my first real vacation.  Ed and I used to visit relatives for a day or two occasionally or camp out for a couple nights.  That was as close as we ever came to having a vacation.  I’ll take lots and lots of pictures.  

I had hoped to hear from one of my doctors after they got the results, but so far have heard nothing.  Apparently my liver did not like being poked.  I’ve had a rather miserable week.  Now I’m just having problems trying to sleep at night.  I have an appointment with my diabetic doctor on Friday.  I expect I’ll get all the details then.